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Well let’s see. I was born during the Blizzard of 1978 in Lima, Ohio. I have lived in Ohio all my life. I like it here. We have corn fields instead of oceans, overpasses instead of mountains and fog instead of smog. Sure it's not the promise land, but sometimes one doesn't need postcard worthy beauty on the outside to have it elsewhere. I'm a writer for fun, a Paralegal for profession, and while one pays the bills, one feeds my imagination, or perhaps my imagination feeds my writing...either way, Writing is as much of who I am as the color of my eyes, or the way that I smile. Blogs are great communication tools, and I'm here to communicate with YOU...yeah, you who's reading this right now....*assuming anyone's out there* *crickets chirp* Alrightee then, IF anyone should find themselves here, be it by accident or on purpose, welcome, glad to have you aboard. Throw anchor, stay awhile! Sunshine & Smiles, ~Heather Lynn~

Thursday, June 14, 2012

It is a scary notion....Rejection:

{Picture kindly borrowed from:  workingwritersclub.com}

Once upon a time in a land not so far away, there was a girl who felt the devastating pain of rejection.
We've all been there haven't we?

It is a profound sadness when you put yourself out there, on a wing and a prayer, and hope and pray, only to have those dreams, those hopes, dashed by the ugly face of "thanks but no thanks".  And that's if we're lucky.  Sometimes rejection comes in much harsher terms.

Today was a good day, I rode my Harley to work, and the ride home was absolutely glorious....just divine really.  A frozen face on the ride TO, was well worth the warmth of the sun on my face on the way home.  When I arrived back here to my house, all was quiet, no one stirring, so I warmed up leftovers in the microwave.  I sat at the table alone, ate my dinner in solitude, and then plopped on my big red couch to watch some television. 

I started out with "Remember the Titans" on the family channel, but it didn't hold me, I flipped and flipped until I settled on a show called "FriendZone".  I'd never seen the show before, but quickly discovered it was a reality television series where people confessed their "feelings" for their best friends.  Being as I'm not a fan of reality television, I was ready to turn the channel, but found myself compelled to watch on, waiting, wondering, would he/she, or wouldn't he/she return the sentiment.  The first couple of young people were a happily ever after, but the ones to follow (as i got sucked into SEVERAL episodes)...were not as lucky.

To watch the testimonials of the would be revealers, to see the genuine nerves, and worry that they could be making a huge mistake, as they risked the sanctity of their current stable relationship for one of uncertainty, and quite possibly demise, well it was just compelling.  I'm not going to lie, I couldn't stop watching. I had to know....would they get their feelings stomped on by the boot heels of love?  Did their special friend hold that same candle for them?!

For as long as I can remember, I've always been a "romantic" at heart.  Yet a realist in my head.  My heart was overwhelmingly generous with itself, and I've suffered the consequences of that specific personality trait more times than I dare try and count.  And in being who I am, I've been rejected.  I've tasted the bitterness that is "I'm sorry, I don't like you" or "I don't like you enough" and it sucks.  It is a feeling that goes deep deep inside and most people, assuming you have a beating heart in your chest....feel a lasting effect from having it happen.

After the shows ended, I felt immensely aware of the sadness that watching those other people's sadness instilled in me.  Like I was a barometer to the emotional temperature of others....I went outside and I sat for awhile, and I couldn't shake the dampened mood.

Nobody likes to have their dreams dashed.
Nobody likes to hear, you're not good enough..
and rejection is not solely exclusive for romantic endeavors.
I stand to be rejected as we speak.
Should I ever get around to submitting my manuscript to someone who knows their stuff in the wonderful world of writing, I stand to be rejected.

And no matter how much you tell yourself, "I'll be fine with it...you win some you lose some", at the end of the day, there will be a part of you that says, "you're not good enough"...
When in reality, rejection doesn't have to be personal.  The people we love, we don't just pick a name out of the phone book and say, I'm going to love that person!  Love, appreciation, smitten-ness, it's not something we can really help, it just comes natural.  We don't know why, or how to control it.  So when someone doesn't love you back, it's not because you're not worth loving, it's just that you're not their preference, their chemical make-up isn't turned on by yours.  Take magnets for example, you can try all day to push the two sides that are unattracted to one another and they just won't cling, while two others, when one's positive and one's negative side are put up to the test, they do attract.  Or how about soda pop?  Why do certain people like Mountain Dew, while others only crave Big Red?  It's not that Mountain Dew isn't a fine soda, great caffeine content, bubbly personality, a very lovely yellowish green color....but some people want something red instead.  Do you think Mountain Dew's at home right now, moping about the house, worrying about someone not liking them...NO, they are not, because, well lets face it, Mt. Dew's a Soda and they don't have feelings and irrational human characteristics! *winks and smiles*

The point is...
I swear I have one...
Is that rejection is not the end of the world, or even an end to an endeavor, it's just a way of someone telling you that you, or your book, or a flavor of soda pop isn't their preference in optimum enjoyment.

That sounds a lot better than,
"YOU SUCK!" doesn't it?

In the end, we're all little soda pops, sitting on the cooler shelf of life, just waiting for someone to tell us we're their favorite.

It's good to just be on the shelf I guess right?

Swearing off watching anymore FriendZone,
~Heather Lynn~

1 comment :

  1. I love your soda pop analogy, Biker Girl. How soon until you're ready to submit your manuscript? Don't wait too long or it will be sitting on the 'manuscript shelf of life' without people having the opportunity to read it. Beth Huffman


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