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Well let’s see. I was born during the Blizzard of 1978 in Lima, Ohio. I have lived in Ohio all my life. I like it here. We have corn fields instead of oceans, overpasses instead of mountains and fog instead of smog. Sure it's not the promise land, but sometimes one doesn't need postcard worthy beauty on the outside to have it elsewhere. I'm a writer for fun, a Paralegal for profession, and while one pays the bills, one feeds my imagination, or perhaps my imagination feeds my writing...either way, Writing is as much of who I am as the color of my eyes, or the way that I smile. Blogs are great communication tools, and I'm here to communicate with YOU...yeah, you who's reading this right now....*assuming anyone's out there* *crickets chirp* Alrightee then, IF anyone should find themselves here, be it by accident or on purpose, welcome, glad to have you aboard. Throw anchor, stay awhile! Sunshine & Smiles, ~Heather Lynn~

Monday, July 15, 2013

Some Hard Humor

So, Jerimy and I have been crazy busy this summer, working on our houses with the slight possibility that we might be buying a house together, IF it ever comes up for sale.  So Jerimy has been feverishly working like a madman on getting all his projects done at his house.  He's been drywalling, putting flooring in, painting, plastering, cutting and hanging trim....and he says to me yesterday:  "you know, the more of this stuff I do, the easier it gets."

And I said to him "Yeah, that's because you're getting good at it!"

And he said:  "I don't know about good, but I kinda know what I'm doing now"

end of conversation.

Right now you're thinking to yourself, that's it?  that's your funny story?  No, there's more.

So I go back to watching DVR'ed "The Following"....final 4 episodes of season 1, and he goes back to patching a hole in the drywall in the hallway.  A little while later, I need to let my pup George out to go potty, I walk from the living room to the kitchen, passing the hallway when I saw something out of the corner of my eye...that had me stopping dead in my tracks and throwing it in reverse to see if I saw what I thought I saw.

I took four steps backward, looked to my left, down the hallway to see Jerimy standing on a chair, both hands working on something at head level, and I couldn't help myself, I had to get closer, because what I saw in that hallway made my eyes get very wide.  I was in shock as I approached him and saw that my eyes were not deceiving me.  There was a gigantic protrusion sticking out the front of his shorts.  With wide eyed wonder, I walked up to him until the bulge was looking me right in the eye and I reached out and touched it.  It was hard, and un-moving under his shorts' fabric.  It looked like he had a ginormous hard on!  Upon touching it, I looked wide up at him and said, Oh MY GOD!!  And I started to dye laughing.  Because upon me groping his groin, and finding that he was holding an cordless drill between his legs while he tried starting a screw on the piece he was patching in he looked down to see why I was feeling up his drill.

I laughed and laughed and said, "Oh, my!  I thought you had a huge boner!!"  

He looked at me and said:  "You didn't see the drill?"

I said "No, honestly from where I'm standing, it looks like you LOVE drywall work far more than any man in the history of guys who do drywall!  I honestly didn't know home improvement was such a turn on for you!?!?"

He then smiled at me and said, "You are such a geek!"

And it is images like THIS of yesterday's events that keep me smiling all day.

Never a dull moment on Clime Street with Jerimy and I....
Nope.  There sure isn't.

"Is that a cordless drill between your legs, or are you just happy to see me?"

~Heather Lynn~

1 comment :

  1. Oh my Heather, this totally made my day!! I love reading your blog...your books!! keep it coming hon!!


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