Toxic Couples:

Recently it's been brought to my attention that I have some dysfunctional couples around me.  You know the couple that fights constantly....the ones who break up a lot, on again, off again....drama drama drama...We've all seen them, hell some of us might of even BEEN IN a toxic couple-ship a time or two.  But the other day my mom told me, "you know it's not healthy to be around couples like that"....and I wondered if she were right.

Do Toxic Couples make you reflect on your own relationship, seeing how different and/or healthy yours is in comparison?

Or does the toxicity of theirs, leak over into the placid sea of your state of love w/ your significant other?

Personally, I'm a big fan of floating on the placid sea of love and tranquility.....ahhhhh....the peacefulness of it all.....shades on, floating, sipping on something fruity with an umbrella in it....

{gets lost in the visualization of that kind of paradise}

{snaps back to reality....}

And what really sucks is you want to HELP these couples, or at least help the half of the couple you consider your friend, you want to throw them a life preserver and say "GRAB HOLD, I"LL PULL YOU OUT!", but we all know, that if there's one thing the toxic relationship does, it sucks you in and in and in until you feel like you can't get out.

And then suddenly, THEIR relationship is frustrating YOU, and you're not even the one in the relationship!

*laughs*

Isn't it funny how that happens?

Personally, I think the toxic relationships of others, can do a couple things for healthy couples who love each other......they can listen to the toxic relationship woes of others, take it in, give thanks that THEIR significant other doesn't do this, or doesn't do that....and take comfort in the fact that no matter what problems the healthy relationship has, it isn't nothing compared to the problems of others.

OR

The toxic relationships of others can cause waves into a healthy relationships placid sea by being a constant negative vibe buzzing around the healthy couple.  Causing irritability, and putting ideas of negativity towards relationships, the opposite sex, bringing up feelings of discontent to the forefront of our minds....since most people will advise the toxic couple to go their separate ways, saying that no relationship is worth that amount of misery to continue on with....the person giving that advice inadvertently has to think about what relationships are worth.....

I'm curious as to your thoughts....do you think the relationships of others distract you in your own relationships, add negativity and discontent, or do you think their drama, their dysfunction reaffirms the good aspects in your relationship that theirs lacks?

Or is it as simple as "Are you a glass half empty, or glass full kind of person?"  Do optimistic people take the toxic couple and say "whew, could be worse, we could be like them", while the negative personality person says, "We're probably going to wind up just like them one day....."

I tend to be glass half full kind of person myself, so when I approach the toxic couple situation, I think the MOST important thing is to KEEP a healthy distance from THEIR drama, know the difference between theirs and yours, learn how to put down the "fixitstick" and try to not insert ourselves into the middle of other people's problems, when clearly the problem cannot be solved by an outside person.  And us running interference in the middle only muddies the already murky water.  Sometimes the best thing you can do is just be there to listen....and then forget about it.

So many times we think we can save someone....when really, the only person who can, is them.  Too many people are sinking....and we throw out our live preservers to those people, but the one thing you can't do, is make them grab on.

yet we still throw the life ring...*shrugs*....we're human, it's what we do.

For top of the food chain, we aren't always the brightest!

*winks*

A good heart filled with good intentions can be as big of a blessing as it can sometimes be a curse.

Thoughtfully yours,

~HeatherLynn~