Inner Voices:

As many of you know, the tone around this blog as been quite somber due to the passing of my beloved Aunt, and then the passing of Chris Terry soon after.

 I say "passing" instead of "dying" because I feel like people "pass over" as opposed to any other notion of life and death. As you might of read a couple posts back, I did my Aunt's Eulogy, and it mostly came to me, what to write/say as I was driving to work one morning, driving and reflecting on what it was to lose someone like her. 

 My heart was so heavy, that my mind picked up the sentiment and began turning it into words. When the thoughts flowed from my mind and through me, I thought to myself how profound they sounded...it was then that I knew as soon as I got to work, I had to write them down before they forgot them.Which is what I did. 

Thirty minutes later, I had a two page Eulogy written and was forwarding it to my sister in Wisconsin, and to my friend Linda to get their thoughts on what I had written, IF it was appropriate to share....etc. 

In reading what I'd written, I couldn't help but feel like somehow, the sentiment, the meaningfulness of what I had written had been lost in translation from thought to word. In talking to my sister Angie, I said, why is it that when my brain generates things, I hear them in my head and they sound like Morgan Freeman....smooth, soulful, wise, PROFOUND, yet when I write them and read them back, they sound like a bad dollar store greeting card? She said, that's because your thoughts sounds like Morgan Freeman, and when you read things you wrote, you hear YOUR voice instead of his. Everything sounds great in the voice of Morgan Freeman! And she's right of course, I could listen to Morgan Freeman read me the telephone book, and not grow weary of it. 

But that leaves me to wonder, how is it that I'm practically and Albino I'm so white, I'm a girl in my 30's, yet my inner voice is a 76 year old MAN, with such lovely dark skin that if he and I were standing side by side, he would make me look nearly see-through.  

My inner voice is the exact OPPOSITE in appearance than my physical self.   

Strange, don't you think? 

I don't know what any of that means, all I know is, I LOVE Morgan Freeman, I LOVE that my brain decided to use the one VOICE that speaks to me in such a calm and wonderful way. I don't care how Morgan Freeman got into my brain, but I hope he knows that he can stay as long as he likes. 

 I mean, I got Morgan Freeman, can you imagine what it must be like for those people who got stuck with "Fran Drescher" or "Gilbert Gottfried"? 

If I'd have gotten either of them, I fear I'd be hauled off in a straight jacket in no time!

I <3 Morgan Freeman, as far as I'm concerned, he can take up residency in my head any ole time!

A Tribute to a one of a Kind, kind of soul....Chris "Superman" Terry

Saturday night, I had a dream of Chris.  First let me say that to my recollection, I have never dreamed of Chris before now, and I have not dreamed of him since.

this was my dream:

I was in a room with chris, a all white hospital room.  I knelt at his bedside, holding his hand, with my head bowed.  The sun began to shine through the window like no other sun I'd ever experienced.  It was so bright, blindingly bright....and gloriously golden, and oh so warm.  The kind of warm that you feel from the inside out.  It became so bright that I could no longer see Chris, or myself for that matter...all that there was was the light.

Then my dream fast forwarded and I was with Melissa, and she was grieving the loss of her beloved husband, so to comfort her, I took her for a drive in my car, we drove aimlessly into the night, it was dark except for our headlights, we were out in the country, and at first we both were sitting there not saying anything, just quiet tears falling, and then, the radio came on and began to Play "Silent Night", and she and I both broke out into sobbing and rivers of tears.  That song was so so so meaningful to us in that moment, we knew it was profound, and meant for us.  We looked at each other, and our eyes were so sad, but yet, we had each other and in that we felt supported by one another....so while the feeling of heartbreak was there, there was also a feeling of love in that car as well.

Then, out of nowhere, Melissa yelled, "STOP THE CAR!" and so I came to an abrupt stop, she jumped out of the car with a hand full of Fireworks.  She ran out into a field, and she shot up into the sky the most beautiful fireworks, like the big commercial kind that boom and fill the sky like no others.....

I told this dream to Melissa yesterday, and I really really didn't want to, for how do you tell your friend whom you love so much, "hey I had a dream that your husband died"....there's just no tactful way to say that, yet she told me, "Please tell me your dream"....and with a heavy heart, I told it to her.

To my surprise, she said "I like your dream, it sounds peaceful"

And I thought immediately of the song lyrics to silent night

"All is Calm, all is Bright"

And I felt compelled to tell her those exact words

"all is calm, all is bright"

I think that is where Chris is

a place where it's calm, and it's bright.

No more in a hospital bed

No more in the darkness of Leukemia...

He's where its Calm, and Bright.

R.I.P "Superman Christopher Terry"

You will NEVER be forgotten

Until we see each other again....

and until then, hopefully you'll keep me company in my dreams.

If you ever want to know what a true hero looks like, it's not a comic book character, it's not an actor on a screen, it's THIS GUY! An American Soldier, A husband, a son, a friend. And right now, I hope you will keep him and his loving Wife Melissa Terry in your prayers. It takes a very brave soul to fight for not just our lives as a Soldier, but to have fought for his own life against Leukemia for so long. I salute you Chris Terry, with all my heart.

Last night Chris went to be with the Lord, I can't tell you how saddened I am by this news. I spoke with his wife Melissa yesterday, and if I could have dove through my phone and held her in my arms I would have. They were one of my "happy couples" you know, the ones that you KNOW GOD put on earth for one another, they loved purely, unconditionally, and now...they will love eternally. My only thought is, is perhaps GOD always knew Chris was coming to be with him sooner than the rest of us, God knew he'd need an Angel here on earth to help him through the last three years...Melissa Terry is an Earth-bound-Angel in my eyes, spared from death once herself in a horrific car accident. I lost my Aunt last week to Cancer, and we lost Chris last night to Leukemia....I will continue to pray for healing for all of us left behind, and for someone to once and for all find a cure. R.I.P Chris Terry, you were truly one of a kind, and you will never be forgotten, that much, I'm sure.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MY ORIGINAL POST FROM 2012

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once upon a time, in a land far in my past, I met a girl.  She sat in front of me in Legal Research and Writing 101.  She was very unique looking I remember upon first noticing her.  She had a tattoo, wonderfully interesting eyes, and very distinct facial features.  I sat next to Kayla, my college friend who hated everyone upon first glace, and I remember Kayla making a snide comment about the girl and I felt instinctively protective of her....I wanted to protect her from anything negative, without even knowing her, I knew that one day I would.

Her name was Melissa, and a couple years later, I was a bridesmaid in her wedding!  Never even met the groom until a day or two before the big day.  His name was Chris Terry.  Upon meeting HIM, I thought to myself, so this is Melissa's Chris.  The soldier, the object of her love and devotion.....I stared at him for the longest time.

I'd heard so much about this man, I'd grown to know him through Melissa's eyes, and now I was seeing him for the first time with my own eyes....and I was curious about him.  After all, he was about to turn my dearest friend in a wife, and a soldier's wife at that!

Through the years, I've only grown more affectionate towards Chris and Melissa as a couple, and they ARE unlike any couple I've ever known.  They truly, truly know the meaning of true love.  Undying devotion, partnership, to honor, to cherish, they do all of that and more.  They have always made me proud to know them and call them my friends....no time more, than now.

You see Chris has been diagnosed with Leukemia, and is and has been fighting for his life against this aggressive disease this year.  He's a soldier, he's a son, a husband, a daddy to little fur face Burt, their pooch, he's not just guy, he's "the man"....and every time I think about the amount of courage, and strength it takes to fight for one's country....and then FIGHT for one's life....all while having a smile on his face, it makes my throat get all tight, and eyes get all watery, and my heart feels swollen and I'm overwhelmed with emotion.  It's been like this since Melissa told me the very disheartening news of the rocky road that lay ahead of them.

My Melissa is just not Chris's wife, she's his biggest supporter, she's his best friend, she's is "person"...and I know that for her, there isn't anything she wouldn't do for Chris, I think she proved that when she shaved her head to show her undying support to him:

{She is an amazing woman....absolutely endearing isn't she?}

Recently, there have been pictures surfacing on the Facebook Page that was created for Chris, it's called "Updates on Chris kicking Cancer's Butt"....Melissa has been really good about keeping us in the loop as to everything that goes on, almost AS it's going on....but here recently, the updates being posted are pictures are of people doing a push-up, holding little signs that says "Push-up for Sgt. Terry"....and again, throat tight, heart swollen, eyes watery!  This to me, is so symbolic, it's so heartfelt, that I could not help but to share it with all of you.  We are helpless to take this ailment away FOR Chris, but we CAN give him a push-UP while he's being bogged down.

For those of you who are friends with me on Facebook, I've started an Album there with the pictures so far, I would ask that should it be on your heart, to have it in you, to give my friend "Super Chris" a PUSH-UP....Go and post it there.  I fully intend to add mine as soon as I can get someone to take the picture for me.

To those who submitted pictures already, you all have hearts of gold and thank you for the support you offer Chris and Melissa, and for the inspiration you showed me....and hopefully everyone who reads this post.

Life is so short, and cancer touches so many....my Aunt Mary is also fighting the fight (Love you Aunt Mary)....so if you have the time, say a prayer for those who suffer, those who struggle, those who are in pain and those who get up each and every day and say "Not today Cancer....you're not taking me today..you're not taking me period!"

I hope these pictures touch you and offer you hope and strength and optimism and LOVE....like they did me.  In a world full of chaos, and political agenda's and everything else that stifles us, somewhere, someone's on their hands and knees/toes, giving a fellow human a push-UP!  I want to be among THESE people.

I always knew, from the first time I saw Melissa, that I would protect her in any way I could....I cannot protect her from this, but your prayers for her, for Chris, THEY have the ability to change lives, to change the world.  Keep these two amazing, WORTHY people in your prayers won't you?  And my Aunt Mary too!

Thank you very much in advance, I will forever be grateful for any support/prayers you can spare.

Sincerely,

~Heather Lynn~

--------------------------------------------------------------------------