The Big Time!

This weekend I had my first book signing after the release of my most recent novel's publication.  It was at Hearth and Home in Van Wert, which for those of you who are not familiar, is an assisted living facility.  Very nice place, and the people there were so friendly and fun, I can't thank them enough for having me out for their event.

Senior Citizens are so much fun, I can't tell you how many times they made me smile, Like for instance when two ladies got tangled up in front of my table one with a walker, another with an electric scooter, they both laughed and were so funny about it!

Then the other lady who cruised past me, and said "I BUY MY BOOKS FROM THE LIBRARY" and then just kept on walking as I hollered out..."me too!" to her...she was sassy!

And let us not forget the wonderful resident of H&H who told us the story about reading 50 Shades of Grey OUT LOUD to the other residents during story time!!  Talk about pure amusement for me and Mike (my right hand man at book signings)....

I joke with people and say "You know you've made it big when you're doing the Assisted Living / Nursing Home Circuit" but you know, if this is the only circuit I'm ever a part of, I'll always be ever so thankful for the ride!

Special Thank you to Stacy Klint & Lisa Stemen!

Next Stop:  PUTNAM COUNTY!!!

Some Hard Humor

So, Jerimy and I have been crazy busy this summer, working on our houses with the slight possibility that we might be buying a house together, IF it ever comes up for sale.  So Jerimy has been feverishly working like a madman on getting all his projects done at his house.  He's been drywalling, putting flooring in, painting, plastering, cutting and hanging trim....and he says to me yesterday:  "you know, the more of this stuff I do, the easier it gets."

And I said to him "Yeah, that's because you're getting good at it!"

And he said:  "I don't know about good, but I kinda know what I'm doing now"

end of conversation.

Right now you're thinking to yourself, that's it?  that's your funny story?  No, there's more.

So I go back to watching DVR'ed "The Following"....final 4 episodes of season 1, and he goes back to patching a hole in the drywall in the hallway.  A little while later, I need to let my pup George out to go potty, I walk from the living room to the kitchen, passing the hallway when I saw something out of the corner of my eye...that had me stopping dead in my tracks and throwing it in reverse to see if I saw what I thought I saw.

I took four steps backward, looked to my left, down the hallway to see Jerimy standing on a chair, both hands working on something at head level, and I couldn't help myself, I had to get closer, because what I saw in that hallway made my eyes get very wide.  I was in shock as I approached him and saw that my eyes were not deceiving me.  There was a gigantic protrusion sticking out the front of his shorts.  With wide eyed wonder, I walked up to him until the bulge was looking me right in the eye and I reached out and touched it.  It was hard, and un-moving under his shorts' fabric.  It looked like he had a ginormous hard on!  Upon touching it, I looked wide up at him and said, Oh MY GOD!!  And I started to dye laughing.  Because upon me groping his groin, and finding that he was holding an cordless drill between his legs while he tried starting a screw on the piece he was patching in he looked down to see why I was feeling up his drill.

I laughed and laughed and said, "Oh, my!  I thought you had a huge boner!!"  

He looked at me and said:  "You didn't see the drill?"

I said "No, honestly from where I'm standing, it looks like you LOVE drywall work far more than any man in the history of guys who do drywall!  I honestly didn't know home improvement was such a turn on for you!?!?"

He then smiled at me and said, "You are such a geek!"

And it is images like THIS of yesterday's events that keep me smiling all day.

Never a dull moment on Clime Street with Jerimy and I....

Nope.  There sure isn't.

"Is that a cordless drill between your legs, or are you just happy to see me?"

Luv,

~Heather Lynn~

"The Ordeal"

Is finally heeeeeeeere!

or "there"....depending where you are! ;)

So my second novel "The Ordeal" was officially published last week, and the excitement and total torture of waiting to hear if it's a hit or a flop has begun.  I am absolutely dying for someone to say "Hey, Heather, I read it and it doesn't suck!"  I have serious jitters about this book just like the first because, well, if everyone hated "Dead in a Ditch" then I would be like....I'll write another, and it will be better!  So when everyone loved "Dead in a Ditch" instead of hating it, well, that's a tough act to follow.  Especially since "The Ordeal" is my favorite book that I've written.

It was so much fun, and I just loved developing the characters, and being able to add some humor into things.  Dead in a Ditch was just so "intense", so with the Ordeal, I wanted to give you a little more to "enjoy" instead of holding you hostage, UNABLE to stop reading.  So if you're looking to be held hostage, wellllllll....be forewarned, "The Ordeal" is longer, it's a little slower paced, but I did that on purpose, I wanted people to be able to read it for more than ONE day like all you crazy beautiful wonderful people who read it cover to cover and then yelled at me for keeping them up all night long on a work-night!

"Dead in a Ditch" was a fun, face paced book, and "The Ordeal" slows down, gives you more meat, more time to read in a leisurely fashion.  So if you need to put the book down to talk to your husband...you can.  If you need to feed or bathe your children, you can do that too.  If you want to take it on vacation, this one should hopefully last you more than Day #1 of your trip!

I placed my first order, which should be arriving by this Friday, I have upwards of 90 pre-orders for copies, and two book signings coming up with one of them being a "Speaking gig", so I'm so nervous!  I'm so NOT a public speaker!

To you who have ordered a book in my pre-order group, I am anxiously anticipating getting your books to you!  To those of you who have downloaded the e-book, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU, I hope you're enjoying it!

Writing is an adventure I take you on when I write a story and you read it,

but you all take ME on an adventure by reading my novels and coming along with me on this exciting journey of being a writer.

For that, I can never thank you enough!

xooxoxoxo

~Heather Lynn~